Iowa's Junior Senator

 Iowa's Junior Senator

I know nothing about anything shady
that makes Joni Ernst less of a lady.
but she is a joke
bought by brothers named Koch.
We should have elected Claudia Addy.

McDonald's Restaurant Destroyed

 

McDonald's Restaurant Destroyed

"Sir, I was flying my drone
when it decided to hone
in for the kill
as if it had free will.
It picked the target on its own."

Twitter Lurker

Twitter Lurker

I joined twitter today
but I have nothing to say.
I hate to shirk
but I'll just lurk
until an idea comes my way.

Follow me on twitter: https://twitter.com/gneveln

Pig Shit Boots

Pig Shit Boots

It should not be considered big news
that Senator Ernst once wore bread bag shoes.
Have some pity on Joni
'cause it is well known -
Wear pig shit boots to school - you lose.

The Limerick Writer's Nightmare

The Limerick Writer's Nightmare

A novel by Stephen King
What nightmare will it bring?
A writer held
while being compelled
to write limericks 'til one is amusing.

TP Part 3

TP Part 3

Over or under?  I don't care.
When I need it, I'm just glad it's there!

The Glue Sniffing Pyromaniac

The Glue Sniffing Pyromaniac

Balsa wood models made from a kit -
I really don't like them one little bit!
But I've made quite a few
'cause I like airplane glue
and they make a nice fire when they're lit.

Redhead College Coed

Redhead College Coed

She asked me, "If I were dead,
I wonder if you would rewed?"
I wouldn't mind
if I'm lucky to find
another redhead college coed!

Insomniac Eyes

Insomniac Eyes

I stare through insomniac eyes
and tell myself all kinds of lies.
How I'll soon be down deep
in a relaxing sleep.
It would sure be a pleasant surprise.

I Read the News Today Oh Boy

 

I Read the News Today Oh Boy

If I read Science Fiction from Two Thousand and Four
that boldly predicts what the future has in store,
can I be confident
that it has the same content
as today's newspaper delivered to my door??

Goodbye Gall Bladder

 

Goodbye Gall Bladder

If you overeat once in awhile
your gall bladder secretes extra bile.
But it will send out a stone
that will cause you to groan
if gorging yourself is your style.

3rd Billing

3rd Billing

If I could write songs like Bob Dylan
I could make maybe one or two million.
But I'm so far under
even a one-hit wonder
In a two act show I get 3rd billing.

Back in the Day - Birthday Spanking

Back in the Day - Birthday Spanking

I looked at my calendar and it would appear
that you have made it through another whole year.
A trip around the sun.
I hope it was fun
and worth another spank on the rear.