Weighing in on the WII

 

Weighing in on the WII

If you weigh yourself in on the WII
you should do it just like me.
Take off all your clothes
'cause everyone knows
that they add about two pounds or three!

Pokémon Go Failure

 

Pokémon Go Failure

I'd like to play Pokémon Go
but I'm afraid I'm a little too slow.
I can't walk very far -
can I use a car?
Oops! I just stubbed my toe!

Where I'd like to Be

 

Where I'd like to Be

Where color of skin means nothing at all
except to describe like 'handsome' or 'tall'.
In the land of the free
where we can be
brothers and sisters at the mid-summer ball.

Naked on the 4th of July

 

Naked on the 4th of July

Someone please tell me why
I can't be naked on the 4th of July.
A country that's free
should allow nudity.
Let's give another freedom a try!

Bigfoot Part 2

 

Bigfoot Part 2

I was on the road late last night.
I encountered a frightening sight.
Bigfoot eyes
in wide surprise
in the glare of my headlights.

Bigfoot Part 3

 

Bigfoot Part 3

If you follow Bigfoot to his hut
you'll notice his expansive gut
It is plain to see
that he shouldn't be
Bigfoot. He should be called Bigbutt!

Bigfoot Part 5

 

Bigfoot Part 5

If you meet Bigfoot late at night
you will go into shock at the sight.
Your life will depend
on being his friend
so don't try to run or put up a fight!

Naked Jake

 

Naked Jake

Jake Arrieta had the guts
to go out and pitch with a naked butt
It's a miracle to me
how we got to see
all that skin without a peek at his nuts.