Wednesday, February 29, 2012

The Worst Day

The Worst Day

Vickie was born on the very last day
of the month known as February.
I tell you it's the worst
that tomorrow is March first
but no one celebrates her birthday.

Do not worry about Vickie dear readers!  This only happens on leap year.  However I think that we all suffer a little due to post-birthday depression.

Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Ugly Man Search

Ugly Man Search

If you search from here to Uzbekistan
I bet you won't find an uglier man!
You'd have to get
way up north of Tibet.
Yet I wager that you would abandon that plan.

Every once in awhile my limericks take me to the Himalayas.  I have to admit that there are a lot of beaches on my bucket list of places to see before I head for the mountains.

Monday, February 27, 2012

The Recalcitrant Child III

The Recalcitrant Child III

 Aren't you being somewhat rash
to assume that a bribe must be cash?
Haven't you heard
a sky-blue firebird
has significantly more panache?

It is time to put The Recalcitrant Child to bed.  I might have to monetize this blog to pay the bribe though.

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Sunday, February 26, 2012

The Recalcitrant Child II - Joshua's Response - a guest limerick by Joshua Neveln

The Recalcitrant Child II - Joshua's Response 
(a guest limerick by Joshua Neveln)
 

Well, it's obviously not me
as I'm still waiting for bribery
you I could thank
for cash in the bank
if you were to pay the recalcitrant fee

Today we have a guest blog that was sent to me in response to yesterday's The Recalcitrant Child.  Stay tuned dear readers for part III tomorrow.


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Saturday, February 25, 2012

The Recalcitrant Child

The Recalcitrant Child

When dealing with a recalcitrant child,
try being fierce, then try being mild!
Then try number three -
reverse psychology.
Use bribery when these have all failed!

Why would you ever need to buy a child rearing book when you have this advice to guide you?  Please send me half the money you save and keep the rest for your bribe.  You will probably need it!

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Friday, February 24, 2012

One At a Time

One At a Time

I tell you that it is a crime
my wife and I spend every dime!
So polygamy
is just not for me!
I can afford only one at a time!

The idea for One At a Time came from a song by the same name by John Entwistle of The Who.

Thursday, February 23, 2012

Four-Letter Word

Four-Letter Word

"Fore" is a four-letter word
one that I wish I had heard!
It should have been said
when I was hit in the head
by poop from a four-letter bird!

Back in the day when I was a kid, I learned that there were some words that you were not supposed to say and that they were called four-letter words.  Naturally we tried to come up with our own list of words that pushed the accepted limit.