Friday, December 28, 2012

The Prettiest Girls on the Planet



The Prettiest Girls on the Planet

Facebook has a photographic policy
that appears to be quite puritan to me!
The prettiest girls on the planet
are my facebook friends, but damn it!
They prohibit public posts of nudity!

New Years resolution suggestion:  Read more limericks!  Happy New Year Dear Readers!

Sunday, December 23, 2012

Back in the Day - Sledding



Back in the Day - Sledding

Mom said, "You must be a dope
taking your sled down suicide slope!
Up in the air you went
now the runners are bent.
Put your teeth in the fairy's envelope!

Sledding was not without its mishaps.  Broken sleds, broken toboggans, & broken glasses were the cost of wintertime fun.  

A tip for young parents:  Have your children put their tooth for the fairy in an envelope!  It is easier to find under their pillow than a tiny lone baby tooth.  The tooth fairy can magically leave the money in the (identical) envelope!

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Saturday, December 22, 2012

Austerity Reply - a guest limerick by Joshua Neveln

Austerity Reply
(a guest limerick by Joshua Neveln)

If your polo does not say JCrew;
And your ascot options are few;
your pants are threadbare;
and ignoring underwear;
you can still enjoy a cool brew.

Another guest limerick.  My favorite kind!  

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Thursday, December 13, 2012

Holly, John, Carolyn & Sue

Holly, John, Carolyn & Sue

In the events leading up to our first date
Holly served as unwitting bait.
John, Carolyn, and Sue
led me to you -
Friday the thirteenth, December, '68.

My wife and I celebrate our first date every Dec. 13.  Holly, John, Carolyn & Sue is a quite abbreviated 'how I met your mother' story for my children in the form of a limerick. 

Sunday, December 9, 2012

Back in the Day - 1968 State Basketball Tournament



Back in the Day - 1968 State Basketball Tournament

At Vets with our past and our future at stake
so a huge collection our class should take.
We should spend every dime
to send Jane back in time
with her jet to destroy Storm Lake.

Who says that high school doesn't prepare you for real life?   My school's loss in the state basketball final to Storm Lake prepared me for every future sports disappointment that I've ever had to face!

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Thursday, December 6, 2012

Cybernetic Jane

Cybernetic Jane

Praying and hoping for healing today.
In a short while I hope to say,
"Cybernetic Jane
is over her pain,
jumping on her Harley, and driving away!"


Cybernetic Jane was written today for a high school classmate that just got a new knee.  Jane is a former fighter pilot.  It is  frightening to think about what she could do if they gave her waldos!

Tuesday, December 4, 2012

Back in the Day - The Prettiest Girl in School Revisited



Back in the Day - The Prettiest Girl in School Revisited

On further reflection I missed the mark.
My mind is out wondering around Greenwood Park!
Pretty girls abound,
but the prettiest can be found
in the pool because she is a shark!

If  you are keeping track,  dear readers, you know that The Prettiest Girl in School is the subject of several of my back in the day limericks.  You also know that I haven't been consistent in my selection.  Come around some time and look at my yearbook with me.  My limericks are mostly works of fiction but you will see that the line in this one, 'Pretty girls abound', is the truth!

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